By: heather

heather — Fri, 30 Mar 2012 16:50:12 +0000

I’m not going to say anything about the story; enough has been said about it already by many others. There are some good elements to it, but, as some have said, there’a a lot that’s formulaic, derivative, cliche-ish. I want to focus on the writing. The jacket describes American Dervish as “brilliantly written.” On the contrary. Akhtar’s use of language is stunningly poor, for someone who calls himself a writer. It’s awkward and clumsy. “All at once my feet were lost and there was no ground.” (p. 220) Huh? Does this mean “All at once I lost my footing and the ground went out from under me.” How about “…a short man in a red suit and wavy salt-and-pepper hair….” (p. 289) I’ve never seen someone wearing wavy salt-and-pepper hair, have you? Seriously, this is a misplaced mofidifer, one of the simplest of writing mistakes. Why is it even here? Why didn’t Akhtar catch it himself when he worked on polishing his work? Oh, polishing; hmmm. Not a word that seems to apply. Nor does the idea of working with an editor, apparently. Worse than clumsy anbd awkward is ugly; this is some of the ugliest writing I’ve ever come across. “…smoke pouring from his mouth.” (p. 291). The man is exhaling cigarette smoke! It isn’t a forest fire. “…egg-shaped eyes….” (p. 319) What the heck is an egg-shaped eye? “…her insides ravaged with cancer.” (p. 19) Cancer ravages the body, not just your internal organs—or, as Akhtar so nicely puts it, your insides. In summation, I could cite hundreds of examples of poor writing in this book, but my point is not to draw attention to a few occasional lapses. I want to draw attention to the bigger issue of the author’s lack of facility with language. It isn’t enough to have a story to tell; a writer has to be able to express that story using the medium of his/her craft: words. If you don’t have a natural ability, then for goodness sake get yourself a good editor, because this is just embarrassing, an affront to all of the really good writing in this world. Please, reviewers and readers: No more with the “brilliantly written” nonsense.

Comments on: Radical Acceptance

By: heather